


Parenting

by I_want_to_hunt_the_Moon



Series: Fatherhood [3]
Category: Feverwake - Victoria Lee
Genre: Abuse being justified by the abuser, Baby Dara, Calix Lehrer Is His Own Warning, Child Abuse, Gen, Implied/Referenced Gaslighting, just Lehrer being an insane psychopath trying to parent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:00:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23882659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_want_to_hunt_the_Moon/pseuds/I_want_to_hunt_the_Moon
Summary: "Do you masturbate?"Calix stared at him from across the table. He didn't think anyone had ever asked that question to him now that he thought about it. No one had dared. No one who was currently alive anyway."Everyone masturbates at some point Dara. It's just something that humans do.""So you do masturbate." Calix felt the sudden urge to start screaming.
Relationships: Calix Lehrer & Dara Shirazi
Series: Fatherhood [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1837267
Comments: 15
Kudos: 25





	Parenting

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this bc I cry about baby (and regular) Dara every day. This takes place when Dara is five so the relationship between him and Lehrer is less abusive. I tried to make it a little bit lighthearted but it got very dark.
> 
> Writing Lehrer was very difficult for me. His actions aren't logical to me but very logical to him so it was difficult to get in his head. I tried to mostly write the version of him that we saw at the beginning of the electric heir. But I still found it very difficult to get in his head. So if he sounds a bit ooc, sorry :/
> 
> It's my headcanon that Lehrer used pet names a lot when Dara was very little. Always pet names that implied ownership or inferiority though. The pet names started up again... later.
> 
> English is not my first language so please point out any mistakes so I can fix them.

Dara was frowning at him, scrunching up his little face in a way that meant he wanted to ask a question. Calix paused for a moment to see if he would. When he didn't he went back to his food. The boy would ask eventually, or he wouldn't. It didn't matter really. Dara slowly pushed around an unevenly cut piece of meat. He had recently begun to insist on doing little things, like cutting his food, himself. It was fascinating to see how he sometimes developed at the exact same rate as others his age while he was miles ahead in other fields. Perks of telepathy, he supposed. It was very handy in most situations.

"What's masturbation?" He said the word carefully, like he did when hadn't heard it spoken out loud but picked it up from somebody's mind.

Calix slowly put down his utensils. "Why do you ask?"

Dara gave him a wary look. "A lot of people think about it? And nobody wants to tell me what it is. I had to ask you."

Calix had expected this. Sex was a lot on the minds of an average person. Dara could read a lot more minds than him, he must have come in contact with those thoughts quite a lot. A flash of annoyance went through him. Level IV should have handled this instead of referring it to him. Well, nothing to do about it now. Calix turned his attention to the 5 year old, smiling gently, making sure his eyes crinkled. Dara was more observant than most people so he had to be careful with his expressions. The boy seemed to believe it was real and he relaxed a little in his chair.

"Do watch your posture, my dear." Dara straightened hastily. "Masturbation is when someone touches themselves in... certain places, I'm sure you've seen where, to make themselves feel good."

Dara thought about it for a second. "That's why they think about it. Because it feels good?"

"Yes I just said that." Calix was careful to keep the smile on his face, the boy was five years old after all, inane questions were to be expected. Even for someone with Dara's intellect and abilities apparently.

"Can I masturbate?"  _ Oh dear lord- _

"No you can't." He wasn't like this as a child, was he? Maybe he understood why Adalwolf was so angry all the time. "It's for grown ups only."

"But you said it feels good." The boy sounded petulant now, close to tears.

He carefully gentled his voice further, "Yes, but it only feels good for adults. You can do it in," he hesitated for a moment, "Seven years." 

That sounded right.

"Do you masturbate?" 

Calix stared at him from across the table. He didn't think anyone had ever asked that question to him now that he thought about it. No one had dared. No one who was currently alive anyway.

"Everyone masturbates at some point Dara. It's just something that humans do."

"So you do masturbate." Calix had to suppress the sudden urge to start screaming.

"Dara," his voice was sharper now. "It is inappropriate to ask people questions like that."

The look on the boy's face told him he disagreed- he made a mental notion to teach him to control his facial expressions better- but he stayed silent. Picking up on the warning in Calix's tone. Dara tended to be well behaved. Although there had been a couple of unfortunate incidents in which Calix had to discipline him. He still remembered the first time Dara had forced him to punish him. The boy had been shocked when he had been backhanded, clearly his parents had used other forms of teaching. He had been screaming and crying about wanting to go back home. Begging for his mother. Calix had explained over and over again that his parents were dead, this was his new home. He could at least pretend to be grateful to be given a roof over his head. Calix Lehrer didn't make decisions lightly. But none of it calmed him down. It had been 1 AM, he had been up since 4 in the morning for work and had been looking forward to going to bed.

The slap had barely any force behind it, didn't even leave a bruise, just a red mark. Dara had been quieter after that. Still sobbing softly as Calix knelt down on one knee and gently explained to him that if he was going to act out Calix would be forced to discipline him.  _ "Act and consequence, _ " he had said while staring into the boys teary eyes. He had further explained to Dara that Calix enjoyed disciplining Dara as much as Dara enjoyed being disciplined. And that Dara only had himself to blame. There was no reason for his behaviour after all. Calix had lost his parents at a young age, been through much worse. He hadn't thrown a tantrum about it.

Later Dara had apologised for his behaviour. Calix had smiled at him, genuinely pleased that he had understood, and accepted his apology. There had been a couple of times after that where Calix had been compelled to remind Dara of his place. A particularly nasty incident came to mind where Dara had tried to crawl into his bed after a nightmare. Calix still had no idea how he hadn't noticed the boy until he was standing right next to him. He must have been exhausted. It had resulted into Dara screaming bloody murder over a broken arm after Calix had struck out on instinct. As he was healing the bone (not the bruises. A reminder would do Dara good.) Calix had told him to never do it again and that he was lucky it wasn't a broken neck. He hadn't tried to enter Calix's room after that.

When Dara wasn't causing problems he was pleasant to be around. His telepathy was fascinating. Although it did create some issues. He still needed to find a new nanny. An unexpected perk of adopting a child was the fact that he himself had been able to read more minds. Apparently it made him seem more human. People, parents mostly, felt like they had something in common with him now. It made building a connection with them easier.

"I will clean up, pet. Why don't you go and play with Wolf?" His voice was gentle again. Dara immediately leapt to his feet and ran to look for the dog. As Calix gathered the plates he could hear him jump up and down excitedly as he called the dog. He would put Dara to bed in an hour he decided. When he finished putting away all the pot and pans he turned to the living room. And walked in on Dara giggling as he was pinned down by the giant dog licking his face.

"Off boy." He smiled indulgently at both of them and sat down to get some work done as Dara quietly played with the dog, he knew better than to make sound by now. When an hour had passed he stood up from his chair and beckoned Dara to him.

"Time for bed," he said. Dara pouted but didn't fight him on it. Standing from the floor and stretching his little arms above his head before running off into the bathroom. Calix followed behind him to make sure he brushed his teeth. When Dara was ready for bed Calix carefully tucked him in.

"Goodnight, little one," he said softly, gently stroking Dara's hair out of his face.

"Night, daddy." The child's eyes were already drooping.

Calix walked silently over to the door, being careful to close it gently behind him. He poured himself a glass of scotch and settled himself back in his chair to finish his work hoping that Dara would sleep through the night. He smiled into his glass.

Being a father was not so bad.

  
  



End file.
